Mother....

A child that has arrived,
Is one that has derived

the beverage of life from its mother's bosom
the warmth of affection from its mother's kisses
the courage of connection from its mother's umbilical cord
the gift of the gab from its mother's murmurings
the luxury of lazing around from its mother's lap

the depth of sensitivity from its mother's gaze 
the courtesy to contribute from its mother's hands
the confidence of doing right from its mother's advice
the bliss of being right from its mother's trust

Mother; the mother of all sources
Mother; the origin of positive forces

Labels

Labels. We can't think without using them, can we? They turn into disastrous and murderous weapons when we employ them to judge people, events and ideas. How many times do we pause before sticking an imaginary label on someone or something? How many times are we willing to pull off that label despite realizing that perception is different from reality. How many times are we incorrigibly convinced that our labels are right forever? 

Is it possible to stop our conditioning, experiences and intellectual limitations from dictating to our labels? Can we settle for labels that are empty until we are sufficiently engaged with the person, event or idea to know that the labels must perhaps remain empty forever? I don't know (to quote my niece on most matters). 

The right place for labels is in the mind's lab where we secretly examine the label from multiple angles and don't let any of our prejudices and past experiences influence us while at it and......finally, shred them to pieces rather than let them splatter black on things yet to come. 

How a Good Person Can Really Win - A Book Review

Book Review: Pavan Choudary’s “How A Good Person Can Really Win”

I enjoy reading genuine self-help books that combine inspiring thoughts with compelling and actionable approaches, ideas and tips. A visit to a well-stocked book shop will prove to you that there is no dearth of books in the self-help section. But as a devoted pursuer of books, I think there are a few things to be wary of.

Depending on the phase of life you are in, your view of life in general and preferred approaches to dealing with its challenges, some books stimulate your thoughts and coax you into taking positive action while some other books are, at best, boring or misleading. Before you impulsively purchase a book, you need to relax, sit down, flip through the book, connect with its theme, structure and ideas. You also need to check if the writing style of the author appeals to your subconscious before you pick it up and rely on it to change your life. 

Well, for a change, I did not have to do any of this to read "How a Good Person Can Really Win" (HGPCRW). The book found me via my blog. To start with, I feel quite lucky about it. 

HGPCRW is not a book that one reads, feels good about and forgets. Nor is it a book that gives you something on the lines of a DIY (do it yourself) kit that you build and reuse everywhere. I think it is a book that you need to keep on your table and refer to regularly. It has plenty of interesting and thought-provoking stories and snippets that one cannot read once and absorb forever. It is a 'situational' book; a book that will give you something to ponder over in many important situations that you may find yourself in. 

The book is split into three parts and the author has done some excellent and appropriate anecdotal research for each of these sections. Part 1 outlines the characteristics of people who resort to vile-like qualities characters. Part 2 unveils advice for the naive and is focused on specific situations. Part 3 gives the reader a set of powerful values to derive inspiration from.

Part 1, to me, was interesting and somewhat like reading the Politics and Page 3 sections of the newspaper. :-) It also made me wonder if normally good-natured people would resort to any of the vile-like methods when under severe pressure. When I moved on to Part 2, I was excited and intrigued by the stories and the anecdotes. Some situations were so familiar that I found myself grinning and reading the insights with gratitude. Part 3 seemed shorter than the other two parts but was a fascinating read because it was packed with concise and powerful ideas. 

In a nut shell, I think this book will be a reliable "guide" that can be approached for advice during difficult situations. The insights will, I think, fascinate and appeal to many a mind.

Disclaimer: The publishers offered me the book for a review. However, the review is a pure reflection of my own experiences and thoughts and not influenced by any external entities. 

Thoughts...

Recent ideas and thoughts that I'd like to gather on this blog. 

Life, Psychology

When you compare, you lose your CORE. What you are left with is only mpa - madness, (self)pity or arrogance. Hint: CO-mpa-RE.

************

Success 

The only situation in which you can blame yourself wholeheartedly for inappropriate results is when you hold the reigns. It's no use saying that the reigns are not in your hands. Sometimes, you need to realize the need to grab it and then grab it somehow (sigh...but how?) or shut up, dance to others' tunes and, ultimately, waste your time, effort and energy. 

************

Life

Situations wherein one connects with nature, (or good human interpretations of nature like music, stories or art), a human being or a paradox are perhaps the only times in which one feels truly alive and aware. Not when one accomplishes something for that ceases to matter after a while, not when one gets an idea for that may become obsolete or change and evolve, not even when one learns something for one may have to unlearn that under different circumstances.

************

Social, Relationships, Mentoring

Advice is plain ice. Insight is choco-nut delight or fruit-n-nut delight (as you like it).
Plain ice is free and can be dunked into anything and everything. Water, juice, coffee, tea etc. It treats everything as equal. A customized ice cream on the other hand needs effort, knowledge and patience and is consumed with relish. It is lovingly garnished with nuts and delivered one spoon at a time. 

************

Psychology, Human Behavior, Conditioning 

To have an open mind is akin to standing in front of fast approaching waves on the sea shore. You must be prepared to withstand the worst onslaught. It may touch your feet gently and go away. It may wet you just a little or a lot. It may overwhelm you, knock you down and fill your mouth with water that you are likely to spit out in an instant. The thing to note, however, is that the grains of sand that stick to you drop off as you walk back home.    

************

Sharing

When you genuinely share what you know - not because you want to teach others, not because you want to influence or manipulate others, not because you want to be acknowledged or praised, and not because you want to receive something in return but because you simply want to express yourself and connect with another mind - you can't really fathom the impact it has on others and what you yourself end up learning and earning from it.

************

God, Life

One of the most common situations that people (rationalists) use to question whether God exists is to point their finger at seemingly nice people suffering or dying either too early or in an unfair manner. It can't possibly be that simple if there is no such thing as "the single truth". They might as well be questioning our knowledge of the intricacies of Karma, the existence of free will and its consequences and the complex interdependence of society.

************

Leadership, Psychology, Human Behavior

Two familiar but always interesting things that caught my attention in a recent movie I watched.
a. Even the most challenging of tasks that the people concerned are skeptical of will begin to look appealing and worthwhile when a leader uses the right words - cleverly connected and genuine words - to inspire and encourage them. Underlying this simple truth is the more complex fact that the leader must have an uncanny knack of customizing the message in order for it to speak to a specific person in a specific context. The more reusable the message, as it flows down the hierarchy, the better! ;-) And, in the real world, there will, of course, be people whose minds need to be pried open.  b. The human ego can sometimes expand to a size that is bigger than the galaxy we live in and when it crosses a certain circumference area, it ceases to look awful and starts looking hilarious  

Life is an Equation

I think at the bottom of every human action and reaction, there is an equation. The equation that he/she shares with someone or something. Catalysts may or may not be present. A person's behavior, ideas, capabilities and emotions are shaped by this equation. It does not mean that a person has no control over his life but his personality is likely to be shaped by these equations. 

When i first heard it, I was mesmerized by the quip that life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it and I still am, but it is deceptive to think that the story of a person's life is based on his reactions alone. It is a sequence of equations. You never know what's going to happen at the end because one or more components of these equations are unknown. You are one part of a given equation and the presence of other entities in it changes the output of the equation and contributes to what you become. 

Victor Frankl was an amazing human being, but he would have probably never written his book or identified his immense strength if he hadn't been subjected to torture. 

Cloudy Thoughts

Three thought-related tidbits from my timeline


Methinks:


If you're ready to spread the most insecure, vague and ambiguous of your thoughts in front of someone without any fear of being judged, ridiculed or rejected, it is likely that this person will also bring the best out of you.


Some wise people pointed out to me that it could, however, cost the relationship in some cases - if the person listening is not ready to accept your thoughts or the fact that they came from you or if the relationship is still nascent for him/her to understand you fully. The second point made was that there may be a difference in the way the person listening reacts if he/she is a strong stakeholder and thus takes things personally or is afraid of being affected. 

***

True in quite a lot of situations even though we may never agree:


Anthony De Mello - "People mistakenly assume that their thinking is done by their head. It is actually done by the heart which first dictates the conclusion, then commands the head to provide the reasoning that will defend it." 

                                                                                   ***

Sad but true:


Recently witnessed how a person with great intentions & high result-orientation can still commit blunders because of getting carried away


                                                                                  ***